User:Oskykins/Tulpa grammar: Difference between revisions

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*visual section needs more info and instructions on how to visualize and eventually hallucinate tulpa.

==Introduction==

'''"The modern ''iteration'' of the phenomenon generally approaches the concept differently, treating tulpas as permanent every-day companions, created to accompany hosts in their daily life."'''

'''"The modern iteration of the phenomenon generally approaches the concept differently, treating tulpas as permanent every-day companions, created to accompany hosts in their daily life."'''

*iteration: use simpler words that most English speaking readers will understand to increase readability for PW audience

*every-day: this word does not have a hyphen. it's either "everyday" or "every day" depending on specific rules:

**"everyday" is an adjective (describes a noun) used to describe things that (1) occur every day, or (2) are ordinary or commonplace.

Line 27:

Line 28:

==Designing a tulpa==

'''"At its most basic level, a tulpa is created simply by designing every aspect of it in as much detail as possible, this includes the personality, appearance and voice of the tulpa but also many other factors which one could conceive of."'''

'''"At its most basic level, a tulpa is created simply by designing every aspect of it in as much detail as ''possible, this'' includes the personality, appearance and voice of the tulpa but also many other factors which one could conceive of."'''

*what you have here is an attempt at combining two independent clauses together using a comma

Line 34:

Line 35:

*you can combine two independent clauses by using a conjunction (and, but, for, nor, yet, or, so) or by using a semicolon

*alternatively, you can simply split up the independent clauses into two sentences using a period and capital letter

'''"It is worth noting ''however'' that once sentience has been gained, deviation from its original design is very common."'''

*however: you ALWAYS need commas between the word "however" if it isn't at the beginning or end of the sentence.

'''"This can be defined as the act of a tulpa altering its form in your mind, or some other ''feature, of its own'' volition, causing it to look or act differently from the host's predefined idea of the tulpa."'''

*feature, of its own: don't put commas where you pause in your head

'''"Whether or not deviations ''occur, depends'' entirely on the tulpamancer and tulpa in question."'''

*occur, depends: don't put commas where you pause in your head

==Applications for tulpas==

'''"The mental construct of a tulpa can be applied to help the host with a variety of different tasks, some applications commonly found within the tulpa community include:"'''

*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses

*split the two independent clauses into two sentences

==Auditory==

'''"For example, early communication is often limited to non-linguistic and/or mutually generated responses, consequently a tulpaemancer should be perceptive to these forms of communication."'''

*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses

*split the two independent clauses into two sentences

'''"Conversation carries an inherent opportunity for response, additionally the tulpa can mutually generate responses from the ideas one talks to them about."'''

*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses

*split the two independent clauses into two sentences

'''"This conversational engagement can be on any topic, the events of the day, abstract ideas and beliefs, reading aloud, story telling, and so forth."'''

*you have phrased the sentence grammatically like this:

**This conversational engagement can be on any topic

**This conversational engagement can be on the events of the day

**This conversational engagement can be on abstract ideas and beliefs

**This conversational engagement can be on reading aloud

**This conversational engagement can be on story telling

*do the last two sentences make sense to you? not as clearly as it should.

*to fix, i have replaced "be on" with "involve"

'''"There are several conditions and practices which can facilitate ''communication that are useful'' while initially developing this ability."'''

*"communication" = singular

**therefore, use "is"

**communication that IS useful

'''"A quiet environment free from distractions is ideal, one should stay receptive to their tulpa but avoid over-expectation which can hinder the young ''tulpas ability'' to communicate."'''

*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses

*split the two independent clauses into two sentences

*tulpa's ability: the ability belongs to the tulpa = it is possessive = use an apostrophe

'''"At first, a tulpas thought stream or mind voice will usually sound very similar or identical to their hosts thought stream."'''

*tulpa's thought stream = the thought stream belongs to the tulpas = possesive = use apostrophe

*their host's thought stream = the thought stream of their host = possessive = use apostrophe

'''"With time and development, ''the tulpas communication'' becomes more prominent as an internal response, more defined as their own unique voice, more capable of extended discussion, and more capable of conveying abstract or complicated ideas."'''

*the tulpa's communication = the communication of the tulpa = possessive = use apostrophe

*can rephrase rest of sentence so it's not redundant as fuck

**With time and development, the tulpa's communication becomes more prominent as an internal response, more defined as their own unique voice, and more capable of extended discussion as well as abstract or complicated ideas.

'''"Separately generated internal responses which sound as if they are simply another thought stream present ''along side'' of ''ones own'' can be achieved relatively quickly compared to audible responses which sound as if they are externally generated for most tulpaemancers."'''

*alongside is ALWAYS one word

*one's own unique voice = one's voice = the voice of one = possessive = need apostrophe

==Visual==

'''"Visualization is the aspect of tulpaemancy with refers to the hosts ability to see their tulpas visual form and their inner mindscape/wonderland."'''

*the host's ability = the ability of the host = possessive = use apostrophe

*their tulpa's visual form = tulpa's form = form of tulpa = possessive = use apostrophe

'''"At the early stages, it may be hard for one to visualize a stable form mentally, it may lack detail or flicker and fragment."'''

*two independent sentences combined with a comma is not allowed in the English language

*split them up using "and" or period and capital letters

'''"The lower level of external visual imposition, that initial stage, is the transitory period before their visible form starts resembling their internal form."'''

*needs rephrasing, too confusing

'''"At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as a darkened shade imposed on your vision, a localized visual distortion, or translucent and blurry."'''

here's how it reads grammatically:

**At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as a darkened shade imposed on your vision

**At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as a localized visual distortion

**At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as translucent and blurry.

*needs rephrasing

==Tactile==

'''"While the tulpa is being imposed on the environment, this refers to the tulpaemancers ability to feel tactile sensation accompanied with touching or otherwise interacting with them."'''

*rephrase, too confusing

*tulpaemancer's ability = ability of the tulpaemancer = possessive = apostrophe

'''"For example, if the tulpaemancer is trying to be able to feel their tulpas imposed form, they could practice focusing on what their tulpas skin, or clothes, or otherwise would feel like if touched."'''

*tulpa's imposed form = tulpa's forum = form of tulpa = possessive = apostrophe

*tulpa's skin = skin of tulpa = possessive = apostrophe

*tulpa's skin, or clothes, or otherwise

**we only use "or" once in a series of lists to prevent redundancy

**tulpa's skin, clothes, or otherwise

==Tactile gradient==

'''Accurate tactile sensation lacking form density/substance''' - '''"phantom sensations" or "touched by a ghost" type experience.'''

*"phantom sensations" or "touched by a ghost" type experience.

**this is an incomplete sentence. it does not have a verb or make sense by itself

*change it to full sentence with subject + verb + elements which allow it to make sense by itself

fuck it. i'm just going to delete this shit though because it is not needed

'''"Tactile sensations such as texture, temperature, material, and weight are perceptible as diminished ''facsimiles'' drawn from memory to the actual physical tactile sensations they represent."'''

*facsimiles: use simpler words to increase readability

*i looked on google and other words that are synonymous with this word and would be more well-known to the readers of PW include: copies, replications, reproductions, and duplicates

*"copies" sounds best and is simple and effective

*"facsimiles" generally means a copy of written or printed material like books etc anyways so it's not exactly the most accurate term to use

'''"Physical contact with the tulpa will be felt as accurate tactile hallucinations which lack substance ie. the tulpas form would not feel solid to the touch."'''

*the tulpa's form = the form of the tulpa = possessive = apostrophe

*you fucked up the "i.e."

*it is "i.e." not "ie."

*you need to format it one of two ways:

**"...which lack substance, i.e., the tulpa's form would not feel solid to the touch."

**"...which lack substance (i.e. the tulpa's form would not feel solid to the touch)."

'''"Fleeting sensation as the result of certain perceived tactile stimuli''' - '''''Dissociation from physical senses.''"'''

*this is an incomplete sentence that needs a verb

*passing out now, will return later

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
+*visual section needs more info and instructions on how to visualize and eventually hallucinate tulpa.
 ==Introduction==
-'''"The modern ''iteration'' of the phenomenon generally approaches the concept differently, treating tulpas as permanent every-day companions, created to accompany hosts in their daily life."'''
+'''"The modern iteration of the phenomenon generally approaches the concept differently, treating tulpas as permanent every-day companions, created to accompany hosts in their daily life."'''
-*iteration: use simpler words that most English speaking readers will understand to increase readability for PW audience
 *every-day: this word does not have a hyphen. it's either "everyday" or "every day" depending on specific rules:
 **"everyday" is an adjective (describes a noun) used to describe things that (1) occur every day, or (2) are ordinary or commonplace.
@@ Line 27: / Line 28: @@
 ==Designing a tulpa==
-'''"At its most basic level, a tulpa is created simply by designing every aspect of it in as much detail as possible, this includes the personality, appearance and voice of the tulpa but also many other factors which one could conceive of."'''
+'''"At its most basic level, a tulpa is created simply by designing every aspect of it in as much detail as ''possible, this'' includes the personality, appearance and voice of the tulpa but also many other factors which one could conceive of."'''
 *what you have here is an attempt at combining two independent clauses together using a comma
@@ Line 34: / Line 35: @@
 *you can combine two independent clauses by using a conjunction (and, but, for, nor, yet, or, so) or by using a semicolon
 *alternatively, you can simply split up the independent clauses into two sentences using a period and capital letter
+'''"It is worth noting ''however'' that once sentience has been gained, deviation from its original design is very common."'''
+*however: you ALWAYS need commas between the word "however" if it isn't at the beginning or end of the sentence.
+'''"This can be defined as the act of a tulpa altering its form in your mind, or some other ''feature, of its own'' volition, causing it to look or act differently from the host's predefined idea of the tulpa."'''
+*feature, of its own: don't put commas where you pause in your head
+'''"Whether or not deviations ''occur, depends'' entirely on the tulpamancer and tulpa in question."'''
+*occur, depends: don't put commas where you pause in your head
+==Applications for tulpas==
+'''"The mental construct of a tulpa can be applied to help the host with a variety of different tasks, some applications commonly found within the tulpa community include:"'''
+*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses
+*split the two independent clauses into two sentences
+==Auditory==
+'''"For example, early communication is often limited to non-linguistic and/or mutually generated responses, consequently a tulpaemancer should be perceptive to these forms of communication."'''
+*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses
+*split the two independent clauses into two sentences
+'''"Conversation carries an inherent opportunity for response, additionally the tulpa can mutually generate responses from the ideas one talks to them about."'''
+*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses
+*split the two independent clauses into two sentences
+'''"This conversational engagement can be on any topic, the events of the day, abstract ideas and beliefs, reading aloud, story telling, and so forth."'''
+*you have phrased the sentence grammatically like this:
+**This conversational engagement can be on any topic
+**This conversational engagement can be on the events of the day
+**This conversational engagement can be on abstract ideas and beliefs
+**This conversational engagement can be on reading aloud
+**This conversational engagement can be on story telling
+*do the last two sentences make sense to you? not as clearly as it should.
+*to fix, i have replaced "be on" with "involve"
+'''"There are several conditions and practices which can facilitate ''communication that are useful'' while initially developing this ability."'''
+*"communication" = singular
+**therefore, use "is"
+**communication that IS useful
+'''"A quiet environment free from distractions is ideal, one should stay receptive to their tulpa but avoid over-expectation which can hinder the young ''tulpas ability'' to communicate."'''
+*another grammatically incorrect attempt at combining two independent clauses
+*split the two independent clauses into two sentences
+*tulpa's ability: the ability belongs to the tulpa = it is possessive = use an apostrophe
+'''"At first, a tulpas thought stream or mind voice will usually sound very similar or identical to their hosts thought stream."'''
+*tulpa's thought stream = the thought stream belongs to the tulpas =  possesive = use apostrophe
+*their host's thought stream = the thought stream of their host = possessive = use apostrophe
+'''"With time and development, ''the tulpas communication'' becomes more prominent as an internal response, more defined as their own unique voice, more capable of extended discussion, and more capable of conveying abstract or complicated ideas."'''
+*the tulpa's communication = the communication of the tulpa = possessive = use apostrophe
+*can rephrase rest of sentence so it's not redundant as fuck
+**With time and development, the tulpa's communication becomes more prominent as an internal response, more defined as their own unique voice, and more capable of extended discussion as well as abstract or complicated ideas.
+'''"Separately generated internal responses which sound as if they are simply another thought stream present ''along side'' of ''ones own'' can be achieved relatively quickly compared to audible responses which sound as if they are externally generated for most tulpaemancers."'''
+*alongside is ALWAYS one word
+*one's own unique voice = one's voice = the voice of one = possessive = need apostrophe
+==Visual==
+'''"Visualization is the aspect of tulpaemancy with refers to the hosts ability to see their tulpas visual form and their inner mindscape/wonderland."'''
+*the host's ability = the ability of the host = possessive = use apostrophe
+*their tulpa's visual form = tulpa's form = form of tulpa = possessive = use apostrophe
+'''"At the early stages, it may be hard for one to visualize a stable form mentally, it may lack detail or flicker and fragment."'''
+*two independent sentences combined with a comma is not allowed in the English language
+*split them up using "and" or period and capital letters
+'''"The lower level of external visual imposition, that initial stage, is the transitory period before their visible form starts resembling their internal form."'''
+*needs rephrasing, too confusing
+'''"At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as a darkened shade imposed on your vision, a localized visual distortion, or translucent and blurry."'''
+here's how it reads grammatically:
+**At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as a darkened shade imposed on your vision
+**At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as a localized visual distortion
+**At first, a tulpa's visible form may start as simple as translucent and blurry.
+*needs rephrasing
+==Tactile==
+'''"While the tulpa is being imposed on the environment, this refers to the tulpaemancers ability to feel tactile sensation accompanied with touching or otherwise interacting with them."'''
+*rephrase, too confusing
+*tulpaemancer's ability = ability of the tulpaemancer = possessive = apostrophe
+'''"For example, if the tulpaemancer is trying to be able to feel their tulpas imposed form, they could practice focusing on what their tulpas skin, or clothes, or otherwise would feel like if touched."'''
+*tulpa's imposed form = tulpa's forum = form of tulpa = possessive = apostrophe
+*tulpa's skin = skin of tulpa = possessive = apostrophe
+*tulpa's skin, or clothes, or otherwise
+**we only use "or" once in a series of lists to prevent redundancy
+**tulpa's skin, clothes, or otherwise
+==Tactile gradient==
+'''Accurate tactile sensation lacking form density/substance''' - '''"phantom sensations" or "touched by a ghost" type experience.'''
+*"phantom sensations" or "touched by a ghost" type experience.
+**this is an incomplete sentence. it does not have a verb or make sense by itself
+*change it to full sentence with subject + verb + elements which allow it to make sense by itself
+fuck it. i'm just going to delete this shit though because it is not needed
+'''"Tactile sensations such as texture, temperature, material, and weight are perceptible as diminished ''facsimiles'' drawn from memory to the actual physical tactile sensations they represent."'''
+*facsimiles: use simpler words to increase readability
+*i looked on google and other words that are synonymous with this word and would be more well-known to the readers of PW include: copies, replications, reproductions, and duplicates
+*"copies" sounds best and is simple and effective
+*"facsimiles" generally means a copy of written or printed material like books etc anyways so it's not exactly the most accurate term to use
+'''"Physical contact with the tulpa will be felt as accurate tactile hallucinations which lack substance ie. the tulpas form would not feel solid to the touch."'''
+*the tulpa's form = the form of the tulpa = possessive = apostrophe
+*you fucked up the "i.e."
+*it is "i.e." not "ie."
+*you need to format it one of two ways:
+**"...which lack substance, i.e., the tulpa's form would not feel solid to the touch."
+**"...which lack substance (i.e. the tulpa's form would not feel solid to the touch)."
+'''"Fleeting sensation as the result of certain perceived tactile stimuli''' - '''''Dissociation from physical senses.''"'''
+*this is an incomplete sentence that needs a verb
+*passing out now, will return later