Responsibilities
My responsibilities include content production, substance breakdowns, grammar checking, quality control, site moderation, site maintenance and the general direction/future of both www.psychonautwiki.org and www.disregardeverythingisay.com.
- In a relationship with: Josikins <33333333 HUGS :3
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Feel free to contact me at [email protected]
Notes
Trip reports
Notes for crazy ass trip
- 50mg of 4aco dmt on a full meal and only 4 hours of sleep, short term memory already extremely fucked due to heavy benzo use withdrawal
- immediately had come up anxiety as i always do, josi reassured me that it was ok and then we seemed to be having a good time and were laughing and listening to PsychonautWiki:Good Vibes as usual, temperature regulation became fucked, started feeling very nauseous and gagged and shit but didnt vomit
- I freaked out and kept thinking josi had died and screamed even though she was just high and looking at the cieling, she had to stand up and keep talking just to prove she was alive, at certain at this point my short term memory disappeared and i was delusional but siht wasnt severe, josi even pretended to die on purpose for the trolololulz
- josi's face was changing and melting at points it was super attractive at other points it was fucked up
- we both cried over how much we love each other and spoke about how we are both god
- josi had to write "how the short term memory? 50mg 4acodmt, Trippin Ballz" and had to show me this over and over as i kept forgetting wtf was going on and shit still wasnt yet serious
- The sun started to go down and the room was getting dark, josi had to plug in a lamp so we could read the paper which proved difficult for her retarded brain and we almost freaked out over just that
- after this i remember passing out and losing balance on the floor the lamp was involved in falling over, it felt like my body shut down for a couple of seconds and i passed out onto the carpet
- from josi's perspective: jenny fell down on the floor for no reason, in a pretty controlled fashion and did not her head or anything, i immediately checked to see if she was alive and she responded with words and was conscious but clearly trippin majour ballsack, i physically carried her (she is tiny/light lol) from the floor to the bed to keep her safe, from this point i remember her freaking the fuck out about dying and needing to come down, i used some benzo liquid of an unknown dosage in an attempt to calm her down but feared she would legit OD if we did because unknown dosage, she was convinced she was dying and kept begging to call User:PJosepherum so that she could see his face and/or hear his voice before she died, we couldnt get the call to work and i told pj that she is ok just freaking out and im here and that i love him, at one point she started suddenly scarily salivating like a fit or some shit, i wiped it away and thought shit is gettin real [1], i logically knew that worse case scenario i could restrain and gag her untill she came down and was more aware (we had consented to shit like this already if necessary lol)
- from josie's perspective: eventually when pj couldnt call she started suggesting her own ideas like CAN WE PLEASE WATCH ADVENTURE TIME TO CALM DOWN, i opened up the most recent episode i could find[2], i put it on and shit was sinister, i tried to pay attention to the plot and knew that this wouldnt be the first time i got delusional over adventure time and freaked out and cried and broken down so i needed to be careful because adventure time, i was sensing messages from jakes mother/father about being a detective or some shit and that things often go very wrong, i marvelled at how far the style/detail of the animation has come, i almost pissed my pants holding back needing to pee whilst tripsitting intensely, eventually she told she had a stopwatch and that she thought ahead and when she remembered this it calmed us down because it showed us 3 hours and 47mins which meant the peak was over and we were calming down, this reassured osky a tonne and she started suggesting her own ideas
- jenny's perspective again: i said "I wish i could be jenny", "I wish i could go back to how it used to be", "I just want to be able to take showers and go outside and stuff", "I wish I could make conversation!" to which josie responded you are my favourite person to make conversation with, I said "Good bye" because I thought I was dying multiple times to which she responded "Hello" lol
- I thought my organs were shutting down at many different points maybe 5 or so times
- I had intense intenernal hallucinations that I was dying and in a room with a candle and it was really important but details are fuzzy, at other points i thought id be reborn as a child in another country or wherever
- We passed our peak, I laid down on the floor with josi and realised i needed to move to britain so that me josi and pj could set up the wiki in person and that we needed to help as many people as possible as a happy triple and work with other communities to continue making a difference, we spoke about the irc, the people we love and the people we want to meet :D i realized that if we just make helping people our goal then we cant go wrong and we spoke about needing to come up with plans and communicating with our loving mothers wtf was going on, we planned exactly how much easier it would be to do this in britain and agreed that we designed it this way ourselves from the start
- JOSI's perspective: At this point jenny became hyper intelligent, aware, capable, happy, adorable, impressive etc and started spouting all these novel ideas for how we can help people and what we should be doing with our lives :)))))))))))
- We started discussing how much we both love pj and discussed indepth the ideas for a trip timer which could have a live stop watch and tell you when are coming down, suggest possible bad combinations, provide reassurance,
- We came down, got exactly what we needed and felt so very refreshed and happy to be alive
- tonnes of unity throughout majority of trip, became god etc whats new lol
♪ ♫ Music ♫ ♪
Quotes
"And so I leave the psychedelics alone for now. I am starting to realize that my effort should be to take not what substances seem like the most fun, but the ones that will actually be most progressive for my life. Even if the only things that help me recover and improve are rest and exercise. I do not need any more madness in my life. I am still struck by the realization that although we all exhibit day to day that we are strong, all it really takes is a moment of weakness and a strong gust of breeze for us to disperse into the dust we were made from and fade away forever. God has given us the keys to life and death, heaven, hell and everything in between… But I’m afraid we are still just children. We have only just begun to learn what happens when the keys to the brain are turned. And behind some doors lie things so great and terrible that the world is not ready for them to be poured out upon its surface." --LucidStudies
Useful resources
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Icons found here: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:SVG_icons
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