Experience:Meditation with cannabis - terminated ego loss: Difference between revisions

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 *'''[[Effect::Tactile hallucination]]''' - "I could feel myself moving slowly trough the wall"
 *'''[[Effect::Scenarios and plots]]''' - "'I' would cut the tie with my current being and move into another being, that of an undefined animal form"
-*'''[[Effect::Delusions]]''' - "I had already died before, and this life I was now living was only some kind of an afterlife limbo"
+*'''[[Effect::Delusion]]''' - "I had already died before, and this life I was now living was only some kind of an afterlife limbo"
 *'''[[Effect::Spontaneous physical sensations]]''' - "This produced a very pleasent warm sensation all over my body"
 *'''[[Effect::External hallucinations]]''' - "The statue I was looking at started to seem as actually glowing, although it was different from what I was trying to visualize. The light wasn't golden, but blue instead, and it seemed that the statue itself was turning into this glowing light, starting from the uppermost edge."
 *'''[[Effect::Unity and interconnectedness]]''' (level 2) - "I felt unity with the statue and the idea of buddha, first as a subjective cognition of 'me being almost the same as buddha'."
-*'''[[Effect::Delusions]]''' - "an idea popped in my head, that I could try to first become the same as a buddha's image. I stood up and faced a wall cloth which has an image of buddha as a roughly real-sized human. I closed my eyes and pressed against the cloth and the wall behind it"
+*'''[[Effect::Delusion]]''' - "an idea popped in my head, that I could try to first become the same as a buddha's image. I stood up and faced a wall cloth which has an image of buddha as a roughly real-sized human. I closed my eyes and pressed against the cloth and the wall behind it"
 *'''[[Effect::Internal hallucination]]''' - "I started to see/hallucinate a completely different view, one of an animal of some sort moving in a forest, in a first person viewpoint."
-*'''[[Effect::Delusions]]''' - "I thought I was on the verge of enlightenment. This would mean, that it would be unnecessary for my mind to continue inhabit this body I was leaving behind, as the person I used to be would from then onwards act in a perfect harmony, bringing as much happiness as possible to everybody around it. But the catch was that 'I' would cut the tie with my current being and move into another being, that of an undefined animal form, and I would start the process of reaching for enlightenment again, from the beginning. I imagined this was the mechanism of how to 'liberate all sentient beings'. Soon after I felt that the whole idea was rather ridiculous, as it didn't really match with my concept of enlightenment."
+*'''[[Effect::Delusion]]''' - "I thought I was on the verge of enlightenment. This would mean, that it would be unnecessary for my mind to continue inhabit this body I was leaving behind, as the person I used to be would from then onwards act in a perfect harmony, bringing as much happiness as possible to everybody around it. But the catch was that 'I' would cut the tie with my current being and move into another being, that of an undefined animal form, and I would start the process of reaching for enlightenment again, from the beginning. I imagined this was the mechanism of how to 'liberate all sentient beings'. Soon after I felt that the whole idea was rather ridiculous, as it didn't really match with my concept of enlightenment."
-*'''[[Effect::Delusions]]''' - "I tried to focus on becoming same with the buddha again, but now it led me to another delusion. I felt that everything in my life, all the people in it and all my experiences had been only in order to bring me to this point. And thus everything was about me, all of the outer reality was only an illusion in my mind. Somehow this led me to a thought: I had already died before, and this life I was now living was only some kind of an afterlife limbo."
+*'''[[Effect::Delusion]]''' - "I tried to focus on becoming same with the buddha again, but now it led me to another delusion. I felt that everything in my life, all the people in it and all my experiences had been only in order to bring me to this point. And thus everything was about me, all of the outer reality was only an illusion in my mind. Somehow this led me to a thought: I had already died before, and this life I was now living was only some kind of an afterlife limbo."
 *'''[[Effect::Anxiety]]''' - "didn't help with my feeling of fear"
 [[Category:Experience]] [[Category:Meditation]] [[Category:Cannabis]]